“I’ll think about it tomorrow.”
Perhaps I’ll make a list of
all the things I don’t want
to think about, too complicated,
too scary, too sad. But making a
list makes me think about it.
Maybe I’ll burn the list in a
“forgetting ritual,” or bury it.
But how do I keep the items on the
list from popping up like popcorn
in my mind, filling me with dread again?
Round and round I go. The more I don’t
want to think about “it,” the more it
haunts me. I try staying too busy, booze,
sex, music, books, endless conversations to
distract myself. “It” sneaks back. “Go away!”
I cry. I’ll think about it tomorrow!